The World We Live In

Sitting around, washing clothes, streaming little known singer, Claire Holley from cyberspace as I surf the Internet.  That is what I'm doing this afternoon, but for just a moment, think about the previous sentence.

My grandfather, Byrce McAlilly, was born in 1910 and died sixty three years later in 1973.  He worked in the lumber business, ran sawmills, watched over the hands, smoked Camel cigarettes, raised beagle dogs for rabbit hunting and lived a hard life.  Just imagine that if in his final year of life, if he had called me and said, "Hey son, what'cha doin'?" If I had answered, "Oh, not much.  Just sittin' around, washing clothes, streaming some music, surfing the Internet." he would have thought I was crazy.   Forty years ago, that answer would have been like speaking a foreign language to someone whose lifespan included the end of World War I, WWII, the Great Depression, Theodore Bilbo and Ross Barnett as Mississippi governors and America's walk on the moon which my grandfather thought was a hoax.

Let's break that sentence down:  "Sitting around" for people who lived off of the land, ate from the garden and lived in a frame home that wouldn't be HUD approved by today's standards, sitting around during the daylight hours would have just been lazy.  "Washing Clothes," yeah, there was a washing machine that my grandparents had access to in the latter years of their life, but the dryer, well that was on the clothes line outside.  "Streaming some music, surfing the Internet," What did you say?  Doin' what with the music?

All of this came to me as I was surfing the net.  I saw a headline that stated, "Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover Model Leaked."  Being a curious individual and one who likes to be abreast of current events, I clicked onto the story.  After seeing Kate Upton in a white parka that she had somehow forgotten to zip up, exposing her bare ample cleavage, (just for your info, the magazine cover said she was Polar Bare), I saw a headline out to the side of the Sports Illustrated story that caught my attention.  It read as follows:

One Baby, Gay Dad and Two Lesbian Mothers:  Imagine trying to explain that to someone from a couple of generations ago.

Or maybe even the trump card:

RICKY: Granddaddy, did I tell you that our President is named Obama?

GRANDDADDY: O'bama, hmmm, family must be Irish.

RICKY:  No sir, it's a Kenyan name.

GRANDDADDY:  Kenyan?

RICKY:  Yep, he's half black.

Granddad chokes out the smoke from his Camel.

Then maybe I could say something like:

RICKY:  Hey, what if I come over tonight and we watch a little TV?  That show, The Biggest Loser is on.

GRANDDADDY:  What's that about?

RICKY:  It's these real fat folks.  They go to this place and they make'em exercise and see who can lose the most weight.

GRANDDADDY:  And people watch that!??

Granddad shakes his head in dismay.

A lot has certainly changed in the past forty years.   Take any recent forty year span and a lot has changed over that period of time.  I feel certain that forty years from now, as much or more change will occur for our grandchildren.  For them, it will not be a big deal.  It will simply be the world that they live in.

Tell Me About It

Katie Zinc, who works with me at my office, gave birth to her son, Abraham Zinc on October 30, 2012.  It was the first child for she and her husband, Louis Zinc.  The odd thing about parenthood is that you really have a lot of "on the job training" in parenting.  New parents leave the hospital with a new born child every day.  They are given this delicate, fragile baby in which they are given complete responsibility.  Somehow it almost always works out for the best.

About two decades ago, my first born, Emily, was just a small child, maybe a couple of years old.  She and I would sit and draw and laugh.  Sometimes we would draw people with big round eyes and button noses or maybe monsters with jagged teeth and square mouths.   Sometimes Emily would sit alone with crayon in hand and draw by herself.  She would then present to me the colorful lines and shapes that meant something to her in her eyes.  Often, I would look at the drawing wondering just exactly what it was that she had drawn and say something like, "That is really good" or maybe, "I like that".

I told M.D. Whitfield, a good friend of mine from church whose wife and daughter are both artists how Emily liked to draw.  He gave me some great advice.  Basically, he told me the following:  When she draws something and you don't know what it is, never say, "What is it?".  Always look at the drawing and nod your head and say, "Tell me about it".

I took Whit's advice and it was so wonderful to have a child sit and tell you what their mind thought as they drew a picture.  Often when you are told, if your eyes and imagination are good enough, you too might even see what it is that they are describing and really mean it when you say, "Wow. I like that".

A few years later when Emily was in Kindergarten, her teacher looked at one of her drawings and said, "Emily, that is so good.  You might be an artist".  Emily looked at the teacher and replied, "I already am one".

Some Rumors I Heard

I don't like to spread rumors but I heard a couple of them earlier today.  Acutally, I like to hear a good rumor, then I use my "superior judgement" to determine whether or not to spread it even more.  In this case, I am a rumor spreader.

First, how many times in our lives have we been disappointed when the weather person mentioned snow and then there was no sign of it?  Or perhaps even worse, snow actually fell onto the ground and then melted immediately right before your eyes.  Or perhaps even worse than that, the snow fell onto the ground, accumulated just enough to get to the height of the lowest blade of grass and then melted before 10:00 AM.  Not enough snow to do anything with and not enough time to do anything with the snow that you really couldn't do anything with.  Such is the life of a resident of central Mississippi. 

Well, today, the National Weather Service has been leaking rumors that it just might snow during the wee hours of the night.  Maybe even up to 1-2 inches of accumulation.  A good central Mississippi skeptic will believe it when they see it.

The second rumor that I heard is also coming from the National Weather Service.  They are talking about the weather being sunny on Friday.  As a gray sky, rain dweller for practically all of 2013, I had to look up exactly what the sun was and its purpose.  As it turns out, the sun is the center of the universe and is extremely hot.  It is located in the sky and will be in the east in the morning and move westward across a blue sky until it goes below the horizon, leaving us all in the darkness of night.  The warmth from the sun helps to keep people happy and makes flowers and plants grow. 

I certainly hope both of the rumors are correct, especially the one about the sun.  As wet as it has been, perhaps our local school districts, government offices and business should give everyone a "sun day" to sit outside and soak in the warmth and the brightness.

Slightly changing the final words of the character "Red" from Shawshank Redemption, I recite the following concerning my thoughts on the rumors/forecast of our upcoming weather:  

I find I'm so excited I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head.  I think it is the excitement only a drenched man can feel, a drenched man at the start of a long jouney whose conclusion is uncertain.  I hope I can make it to see the sun, to see it, to feel it, to smile in it's face.  I hope it is as bright and warm as it has been in my dreams.  I hope.

Belong to Something

“So it’s generally my advice to young people everywhere, but particularly if you are from a smaller, rural culture: ”Belong to something”… people, a state of mind, a way of life, put down some kind of roots if you want to make art, to help it grow.” 

-Keith Carter

The above quote came from Shaun Kelly's blog, Camera Reality.  I know Shaun from our brief time together at Northside Baptist Church in Clinton, MS and a week long mission trip to Macedonia.  A few years ago, Shaun pulled up roots and he and his wife, Savannah (a great name), both natives of Mississippi, made their way to California in the Los Angeles area.

Our only communication has been through Facebook but since they are fairly regular in updating, I have been able to keep up with both of them.

Savannah and Shaun in Macedonia, 2007

Shaun will never be mistaken for a good ole boy from Mississippi.  He is soft spoken with a certain gentleness about himself.  Generally, he will be found in a worn button up shirt, sleeves rolled to 3/4 length and untucked over his long pants which slightly cover his Chuck Taylor style, Converse Allstars.   Often, he will have a camera in his hands.  He has a nice head of black hair and when he sets his mind to it, he can grow a great beard. He had this "Turkish" look of a full, bushy black beard when we boarded an airplane with four other people (my son and his wife included) on our way to the country of Macedonia in Eastern Europe.  We were sent there by our church on a mission effort to teach English as a second language in a mainly Muslim village called Sredno Konjare.

It was on that trip that I gained great respect for Shaun Kelly.  Shaun became more than just this twenty something year old guy in a pair of Converses.   I watched Shaun as he befriended my then 14 year old son and was a friend and teacher to the children and people of the village.  He helped to lead our group.  We had been sent not only to teach English as a second language but to take money that our church had raised during the Advent season around Christmas for the purpose of providing running water to seventy-three households.  We were successful in this project and it was one of the most exciting and rewarding things that I have ever been a part of.

Now Shaun is a Californian and has been so for about five years.  For now, his roots are planted in that soil.  He may never return to Mississippi but even if he doesn't, he belongs to us and we belong to him.  Just this week, Shaun wrote a short blog titled: to be a whole artist; Not a Californian, But a Mississippian and the Rest of it is Got Up, he writes of a sense of place and belonging.  A time to wander and a time to settle down.  While I don't know what the future holds for Shaun Kelly, I find it interesting that when he was a resident of Mississippi, he didn't choose the easiest route to travel.  Shaun marched to the beat of a different drummer.  Like so many Mississippi artists, musicians and writers before him, his thoughts, what he believed in and stood for, often they cut against the grain of what the average Mississippian would deem important and worthy.  And yet, Mississippi is home.

Recently, Shaun wrote of his father in a wonderful blog titled: Stuff I Gotta Remember Not To Forget.  While I don't think Shaun and his dad always saw eye to eye, when reading the blog, I sensed a respect and thanks and sympathy for his father, an honor and sense of gratitude for the sacrifices that his father made for Shaun and the rest of his family.  A working man, doing what had to be done.

 When you see and talk to Shaun and listen to his views on many topics, you wouldn't expect that he is from Mississippi, but sometimes you can't judge a book by its cover.  His wife, the librarian can tell you that.

Where Would Notre Dame Rank in the SEC?

We have heard of the luck of the Irish but after watching the BCS National Championship game between Notre Dame and Alabama, it became apparent that skill, strength and speed would be what would win the game, not luck.

Notre Dame had a very good team but not a great team.  Looking over Notre Dame's schedule, of all the teams that ND played, only one team played an SEC team during the regular season and that was Wake Forest who was soundly defeated by Vanderbilt.  The national championship game was a game between two different football cultures.  Notre Dame has a proud football history and tradition but they were embarrassed in the championship game.

After watching the game, I did not feel that Notre Dame was the second best team in the country and even wondered where they would rank if they were members of the SEC.  Here is what I came up with:

Notre Dame played the following teams during their successful season who played against SEC teams:

Michigan defeated by South Carolina, 33-28 in a bowl game

Oklahoma defeated by Texas A&M, 41-13 in a bowl game

Pitt (triple OT win by ND) defeated by Ole Miss, 38-17 in a bowl game

Wake Forest defeated by Vanderbilt, 55-21 during regular season

Of course, ND was defeated by Alabama, 42-14.  If Notre Dame were a member of the SEC, where would ND rank?  I feel that at best they would be a mid-range SEC team.  The following is how I would rank the 2012 SEC teams plus ND:

1.  Alabama

2.  Texas A&M

3.  Georgia

4.  S. Carolina

5.  LSU

6.  Florida

7.  Ole Miss

8.  Notre Dame

9.  Vanderbilt

10. MSU

11. Arkansas

12. Missouri

13. Auburn

14. Kentucky

Maybe an eight team playoff format would bring forth the best teams for the championship game.  Hopefully at some time in the near future we will see it happen.  

The Most Important Person

As 2012 comes to a close, the newspapers, magazines and television will show the leaders and celebrities that have died during the year.  They will be the "important" people that will be "missed" as we move into 2013.

What I have discovered as each year passes is that it really determines where you are or what your situation is in determining who the most important person is.  On Friday evening, on her way to a friends wedding, my daughter's car decided not to crank as she sat at the gas pumps at Obie's Chevron in Clinton.  She called me and stated in a matter of fact way, "My starter has blown up on my car.  It won't crank".  Fortunately, her car was right next door to my office and fortunately starters don't blow up.  I went next door with jumper cables in hand.

Upon quick inspection it became apparent that the battery clamp was broken.  I looked up just in time to see David, a mechanic at Obie's as he stepped out the front door of the convenience store on his way home.  I asked David if we tried to duct tape the clamp to the battery if it would work.  He stated that it might, but that it also might catch on fire and then he said, "Pull it around to the back."

David in quick manner replaced the clamp and advised us to run by when the shop was open and pay for the clamp.   David worked on the battery clamp when he really didn't have to.  At that moment, it was obvious that David was the most important person in the area.  Had the Governor driven up with his motorcade to fuel up, for my needs, David would have still been the most important person there.

Each and every day, we meet people who are important in their own right.  Perhaps it is the cook that prepares our meal or the housekeeper that cleans our hotel room or the nurse who keeps our loved ones well.  Maybe it is the teacher that educates our children, the public works employee who helps to keep our city running smoothly or even something as basic as a good mother or father.  All just doing their jobs.  Generally, these are people of very little power but people who make a big difference and who are important.

Let the networks and the rest of the media spotlight the most known and "important" deaths of 2012, but for all of us, it is important not to look at wealth, power and prestige in determining the importance of a person.  Let's not judge importance by celebrity but by the true worth and character of a person.  Each person is important to someone or some group of people for one reason or another.  We should always celebrate these people with kindness and thanks and even a good tip.  We should do this because it is important.  In doing so, we celebrate the importance of the living rather than the dead.

An Idea On Limiting Gun Violence

After the shooting at the Connecticut elementary school, many are asking the questions, why and how and what is the solution to making sure that this never happens again.

I have listened as many of the talking heads immediately go to some sort of gun control as the solution.  I watch on Facebook as others state that when God was taken from the public schools, it opened the door for this type of thing to happen. 

We all know that a twenty year old man with a history of mental disorders, took guns that his mother purchased legally, went to the local elementary school and began firing with an automatic weapon, killing twenty-six people, twenty of them children.

Michelle Mcloughlin / Reuters

What could be done to make sure that this never happens again?  Sadly, I think very little, however the odds of it happening again could be reduced. 

One idea might be to tie the purchase of a gun directly to your health records?  Instead of simply running a criminal background check (which would have done no good in Connecticut or most mass shootings), also have the purchaser sign a medical release form to order their medical records (with a $50 fee for the records).  If the records come back and have any type of mental condition, mood disorder, anxiety, etc, then that person would not be eligible for a weapon.

What about people who simply needed an anti-depressant during a rough time in their lives?  Place a ten year waiting period from the last prescription written before they can purchase a gun.

This step would not take guns from people but would help in not arming someone whose mind is not well.  It is my opinion that this one step would help.

As for God not being in our schools, I don't buy that.  God is within each and every one of us.  When a child or teacher filled with God enters a pubic school, then God is a part of that school.  When love and compassion is shown to a student by a teacher or one of their peers, then God is there.  When anyone can attend our public schools whether rich or poor, of whatever race or gender, of whatever background or family situation or whether handicapped or able, then God lives in our schools.  When we allow people of all religions and faiths to be a part of our public schools, then God lives in our schools.

Pray for our schools and for the safety of the children in each and every one.  There is no way to make our schools 100% safe.